I tried.

I tried to make him all that I ever wanted

and all I ever needed. I pretended every word

he said was perfect. That maybe you needed

saving from this cruel world and maybe my

love was like kryptonite, an antidote for all

that is evil or bad or not-so-good. I tried to

remember those eyes, pretend that they could

see into my soul and see that I was ready 

for love and I was ready for love personified

to be him. I imagined he felt the same but

in the back of my mind I knew it was just

my imagination, running away with me.

I saw.

I saw other people doing the same as me, and

I called them dumb. Shook my head as they

traded their common sense and heart's defense

for a moment's illusion of love. I'd scoff and think

I know what I'm doing as I tried my best tricks

and games to lure his heart. 

I thought.

I thought I could make him a man worth loving.

I tried to make his faults into accomplishments,

his weaknesses I saw as strengths. His flaws I saw 

as beauty marks. I tried, I saw, I thought but in

the end

I found

Minus all the lies

the illusions

the hopes

and dreams

My man worth loving was nothing to be loved.